I slowly unzipped the back of her black and white dress while gently exploring the surface of her lips with mine. I brushed her shoulders, causing the dress to fall to the floor.
She was beautiful.
Her body was one that showed that she both cared for herself and cared to live life to its fullest. Pale skin covered her voluptuous, soft curves. Her deep red hair brushed against my hands that rested on her back. Her lips were tentative, respectful and unsure. This was her first time doing this.
“Don’t worry, I’m here to spoil you. You don’t have to worry about doing anything”, I reassured J. She smiled and her eyes softened, as if she let out a breath she was holding. As she leant in to kiss at my neck, I looked to my left and smiled at G. He lay on the bed, watching his partner explore me. He seemed hesitant to join in, as if he would be interrupting something poignant for J.
“Are you going to do the honours with my dress, or am I G?” I asked cheekily.
G slipped off the bed and walked over. I felt his firm muscles reach down to the bottom of my grey dress and start to lift it higher and higher. He peeled off my dress, leant over my back sandwiching me in the process, and kissed his beautiful partner, and then…..”
And then I believe the story becomes too personal to share. I do not think it is my story to tell in full, as this was this J and G’s first encounter together with a professional girl. This is also how I spent my evening three nights before Christmas. And I have to say, it was a total pleasure to be someone else’s present, to be unwrapped by both the giver and the receiver. Technically I was a present to G, but to be honest I think J was more intrigued. It was a total honour to be allowed into such an intimate area of a relationship, to be given total access to their romantic connection, even if they did not realise that they were doing this at the time.
thankyou for showing me what love is.
I know I have blogged about relationships before; I have blogged about how damaging a lack of communication can be. For most men in a relationship, they seek me because there is some channel of communication blocked between them and their partner; whether this is out of fear or lack of understanding from either party, it results in an unhappy and often short stage of life and love together. J and G, however, are the perfect example of how open communication can be engaging, warming and bring a deeper understanding to a relationship.
When J met G, she was very ‘vanilla’. She never dreamt that one day she would find herself buying another woman for the man that she loved. From the beginning however, G had said to her that he would never be able to be a one woman man.
Now please, I can hear all the romantic feminists screeching their disdain at his lack of humanity and loyalty. If you are sitting there judging them then I think you should fuck right off my blog page because unless you’ve walked a mile in someone else’s shoes, you have no right. And no one has walked in your shoes but you. If you’re undecided, then please don’t mistake his comment for lack of love or respect. I of all people know this isn’t true, after I spent most of the night devouring their devotion with my own eyes. Little intimate moments that betrayed their feelings occurred frequently throughout the night at the most surprising of times. I remember walking out of the bathroom and finding them embraced together, kneeling on the bed, just being close to each other. Later, while waiting for the lift to take us downstairs at the end of our tryst, G pulled J close and kissed her softly.
In fact, the best memory I’ll take from the whole experience was this… I was lying in bed with them afterwards, and I remember intently watching J who was watching G. She had been talking to me and then looked down while G spoke and her eyes changed. They sparkled with effervescent adoration; everything felt mute at that point and all I could see and feel was love. I’ve seen people look at their partners with love before, but there is something different to that look in the bedroom. It is much more primal, much less guarded as there are no public opinions or prying eyes to guard against – it is total exposure to ‘them’.
This is what openness gives to relationships. It gives you a better understanding of each other’s desires, each others’ way of being, each others’ nature. It increases exploration, it opens your mind and more importantly, it opens your heart. It removes walls, removes inhibitions, removes fear of judgment. An experience like this particular story allows you to see people in all their lights; it allows you to see how they treat other people at their most intimate and vulnerable moment, and it shows you how much they truly care. And these two care deeply for each other.
Openness doesn’t have to mean a third person, but it does mean sharing your deepest desires, whether sexually or personally, with that person. At the same time, openness is accepting your partner no matter what they ask for and looking at them with no judgment. For example, I have met many a man who had a fetish that the partner frowned upon and this caused him to seek professional help. If that partner could only open their eyes and their mind to the possibility of someone else’s desires being different to their norm then maybe those relationships would not be shrouded in secrecy. I’ve always believed that if it helped my relationship, I wouldn’t care if my partner worshipped my feet or wanted to be bound… if it makes them happy then it will make me happy to give that deep acceptance to an area of their life that is often smeared by the public arena with shame.
So J, I am so proud of you. I am so proud of the fact that you could shrug off your idea of a ‘normal’ relationship and be there for your partner in the way that he feels he needs. I hope that over time you will learn each others’ bodies down to every groove and every desire, and that you will continue to be honest with each other to the end, whenever that may be.
Finally, to both J & G… Thankyou for trusting me, for letting me into your fantasies, and most importantly – thankyou for showing me what love is.